You ever have one of those days? The kind of morning when you wake up feeling more tired than when you went to bed? Those days always make me wish I had the freedom to stay in bed, pull the covers up and not put a toe on the carpet until I damn well feel like it. The kind of day where you want to eat leftover cold fried chicken for breakfast, chocolate ice cream for lunch and quite possibly an entire bag of Funyuns for dinner, but only if they are Wasabi Funyuns (sadly, discontinued).
I'm having one of those days. Yes, singin' the Monday blues. The cause of it is the sad state of our finances. With my sweet partner-in-crime laid off, our checking account is anorexic to the point of Karen Carpenter-hood. Our wedding is in November and we've knocked our budget down to the bare bones. And by bare I mean that if our budget was a dress, Tila Tequila would want to wear it.
I'm okay with a casual reception at an ultra casual location because I'm more of a casual girl than anything else. I'm very much okay with everyone getting to wear comfy, tempurature-friendly clothing to our celebration. I'm okay with the idea that we can't afford a caterer, so we'll spend the day prior to our wedding (Thanksgiving) cooking for the reception. I'm okay with hauling Jaime's sound equipment so that we don't have to hire a DJ, only hook up a laptop & run music. I'm okay with not having loads of fresh flowers everywhere you turn.
I'm so sad at only one thing, a trivial detail considering that I'm bagging a great catch of a husband. I can't afford a wedding cake. A beautiful and unique cake is the only part of a traditional wedding that I truly adore but...gorgeous cakes cost a serious amount of bank. We are rich in many ways but not in terms of ink & paper with pictures of various dead presidents on them.
And that, dear reader, is what is bringing me down today. Usually I can work myself up into a seriously good rant and rave about all kinds of issues but today it's simply a selfish whine about a cake. I feel ridiculously shallow, but at the same time tears sting my eyes. It's a freakin' cake, for cryin' out loud! But giving up this one desire is difficult and sad.
Hah, just when I really get into feeling bad for myself, writing this post, my insurance company calls...they have a "Well Aware" program that I got hooked into when I was in a car accident a few months ago. When I told the nurse my back was feeling fine he ominously said "We'll keep you in the program. You never know, your back could be fine one minute and in the next half hour you're in major pain". Nice. Just what I needed to hear today, to boost my spirits. Can't help but laugh!