Pulling A Carrie Bradshaw

I've always been curious about why things happen the way they do. This week I've been pondering the little quirks that come with having a relationship. Most specifically, the things that happen only when you are in a relationship. So here's my Carrie moment:

Why is it when you are single it seems you are never approached, only meet men that you wouldn't wish on your worst enemy and can't find a decent date even if you paid an escort to go out with you but the minute you commit to someone you suddenly become the world's most sought out woman?

Why is it I couldn't get a date during my years of being a singleton but now I get hit on fairly often? And for those of you out there who are single but get hit on weekly or even daily and wonder what is wrong with me that I don't...well, you are gorgeous creatures with beautiful bodies who wear hip & stylish clothes and always have perfect makeup. I am an average looking woman who doesn't own a lot of clothing and wears minimal makeup 'cause I never learned how to do my face properly. You have the advantage. Relish it.

Back to the topic at hand. I have been hit on at the grocery store and the gas station. I've been leered at by a man standing next to his car as I walked up 6th to Congress. Well, he could've been leering at Frederick, which is usually the case, but I'm fairly certain he kissed his fingers at me when we passed. Probably because I was staring back at him. He was hot in that Latino kind of rough trade way. On second thought, he probably was looking at Freddy. But there's no mistaking that the man who hit on me in Lowe's was looking at anyone else. His come on was the most original line I've ever gotten: "Are you Hawaiian?". For those of you reading my blog who don't know what I look like, let me clue you in on why that line is so amusing. Despite being of mixed race (Anglo dad, Latina mom) I am total white bread city looking kind of woman. Brown hair, fair skin, blue eyes. Yeah, I'm Hawaiian. It did make me smile that a guy wanted to talk to me badly enough to ask a completely random out-of-thin-air question. He was very nice and complimented my eyes and smile before I sent him on his way down the paintbrush aisle by telling him that "no, I'm not married, but I have a boyfriend". I've been hit on by single men as well as married men, their gold wedding rings glinting as they raise their drink to the lips that moments before whispered an adulterous suggestion. I've been hit on by women, both single and those whose girlfriend at home would surely beat me to a pulp if they knew I had the sassy audacity to seize their lover's attention.

I think that the "opportunities" that start sliding across our social inbox is the Relationship Fairy's system of checks and balances. It's the angel and devil on each shoulder method of weeding out people who are ready for relationships and those who aren't. Or maybe it's the universe's way of balancing things out by giving one person the power to pay back the bad karma of their partner. If that's true, then my boyfriend must be taking someone else out at least twice a week. I was not a nice person to be in a relationship with for oh, say, most of my 20's, so I know I racked up a lot of bad karma. Or maybe it's nothing but bad timing and complimentary coincidence. And people who can't seem to find happiness through faithfulness. God knows I have at least one serial adulterer in my group of acquaintances. He loves his wife and would never leave her but has ongoing relationships all over town.

I think most people who are in relationships will find someone else that captures their interest and piques their sexual appetite and I bet it happens not once or twice but many times throughout a lifetime. And others will be captivated by you and approach you with either charming openers or silly questions. I'm sure many marriages fail and long term relationships end because the freshness, the spark has faded and one party starts to long for that exciting time of flattery and flirting, of furtive glances and the first delicious kiss. I believe that you can rekindle romances instead of stepping outside of them, but obviously most of the country doesn't share my opinion. A provisional estimate from the National Center for Health Statistics has the nation's divorce rate at 38%. Wow. Now not all of that is due to someone forgetting the part where you vow to be faithful to your partner, but it's still a staggering figure.

I think, to paraphrase one of my favorite movie quotes, some of us are always dancing with one eye on the door, looking for the next best thing while others see that while the grass may be greener on the other side of the fence, the garden you've cultivated has deeper roots. As for me, I'll meet all compliments and come on's with a smile and a thank you and later happily share with my boyfriend that someone else found me desirable. I'll admire the beautiful slant of a cheekbone, stare lustily at someone's sensuous full lips, sneak peeks at gorgeous muscled lines down some hardbodied man's torso, heck I'll even openly gawk at a hottie at Town Lake and I always flirt outrageously when provoked...but I'm happy at home and quite content to stay that way. What are your thoughts?

Bookmania

Since my top 10 movies post had me thinking about all the other "love them" items in my life, I thought I'd post my top books. Some of these are adult books, some are children's books and some are young adult. All are worthy, and again, I've probably left tons out. My favorite way to spend summertime was reading, whether I was indoors in the air conditioning or outside laying under the tree in the front yard appreciating the thick carpet grass that my parents spent all spring cultivating to lush rug-like fullness. So here we go with books (or book series) in no particular order.

1. The Hobbit (J.R.R. Tolkein)
2. Dragonsong (Anne McCaffrey. I loved the whole Pern series, really)
3. Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle (Betty McDonald. Remember the radish cure for nonbathers?)
4. The Chronicles of Narnia (C. S. Lewis)
5. Strawberry Girl (Lois Lenski. I read all of her "Girl" series)
6. Harry Potter series (J. K. Rowling)
7. Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter series (Laurell K. Hamilton)
8. Dune (Frank Herbert. See, Frank, I have tons of Sci-Fi on here. While you were watching it, I was reading it. Later in life I'd start watching.)
9. A Wrinkle in Time (Madeline L'Engle. I read all of the Murray family adventures.)
10. (3-Way Tie) Interview with the Vampire (Anne Rice), The Witch of Blackbird Pond (Elizabeth George Speare) with The Once and Future King (T. H. White)

Okay, so I cheated a bit and really have a top 12 list. But I left off so many great ones! Where the Red Fern Grows, The Boxcar Children series, The Wizard of Oz series, all my guilty pleasure Star Trek books & Jude Devereaux cheap historical romance books, Atlas Shrugged, To Kill a Mockingbird, Gone With the Wind, Lord of the Flies, The Exorcist (okay, so it wasn't great but I enjoyed being scared spitless) and even The Handmaid's Tale. If you'll leave me a list of your top books, I'm sure there will be some I've forgotten but also loved reading over the years.

The Wheels On the Bus Go Round and Round

Today Frederick and I started our campaign to lower expenses, namely the amount we spend on gasoline. Instead of driving to his house and carpooling to work, I parked. Popped inside for a moment to say hello to my furry stepkids (love you, Sammy, Skeeter & Logan!) and good morning to Jed and Adrian. Adie looked up from his exersaucer and happily said "No!" to me when greeted. We left Poppa tearing around the house like a mad man and set off on our short walk to the bus stop. Yes, the bus stop. I sat on the bench, clutching my $10 unlimited bus rides for 31 days pass, and listened to Frederick tell me how his new tent that is supposed to take 10 minutes to set up only took him 20 minutes...until he tried to attach the rain flap, which took him another hour or so.

The #5 Woodrow was right on schedule. I was surprised at how clean the bus was, and how everyone riding looked, well, like us. I guess I've seen too many movies with inner city bus rides where there is trash on the floor, graffiti on the walls and a schizophrenic person in the seat next to you. All in all it was a pleasant ride to work. The bus stop closest to the office is conveniently at the Starbucks at 6th & Congress. Even so, counting the time we took stopping for Freddy's caffeination, we made it to work in right at 40 minutes. If you add my drive time to the house, it was just under an hour. Yeah, if we'd driven to work, it would've saved time. So what? I'm hoping that by cutting my weekday commute by 50% I won't be spending more than $30 filling up my tank each week.

What are you willing to do to combat the high cost of gas?

Top 10 Movies

I always get those emails where you are supposed to get to know your friends better by answering about 25 questions including things like whether you prefer mayonnaise or Miracle Whip and your favorite movie/book/tv show. I can't ever decide on just one. So, off the top of my head and most likely forgetting a real top 10 fave, here is my movie list. Please, no groaning comments over my taste or lack of it! But definitely drop me a comment with your top 10 flicks! These movies aren't in any particular order, just the top 10 that I watch over and over...you know, the one where you're lazily channel surfing and end up on TNT and decide it's a good day to watch it just one more time.

1. Steel Magnolias
2. Latter Days
3. Star Wars
4. Interview With the Vampire
5. Jaws
6. The Sound of Music
7. Grease
8. The Terminator
9. The Color Purple
10. Gone With the Wind

I could totally do a runner's up list, but alas, there are just too many to list. My favorite movies would probably be a list of close to a 100 and that would be just too long of a post. So, what are your's?